Slow fade. Slow recovery.

It was a slow fade.
It’s not to be mistaken for a quick recovery
Aย  painful fade that has lasted too many years
(I suppose the fade still lingers till all is revealed)

Each passing day was another day broken-down by fear
A slow destruction of a child
and the unexpected destruction of an adult…who never saw the wrecking ball as it restyled

All that has ever been compiled
has now been replaced with his violence and revile
All the present moments get swept away
Because all her once entitled moments
became and become untitled


Moments that were stolen under a blanket sky
…Titled moments that only became untitled
because she was hushed in a recital
that became very vital

When the game became disarray
as life depended on her to play
to obey
All that she had endured had led her to this day
Led her to the prey
a performance well rehearsed
has now taken its place

It really all doesn’t matter
it’s all a disgrace

I won’t deny the pain
I won’t deny the change
I won’t leave these moments untitled
but please then
rescuer me from me
and all the lies I believe

Tell me I am still the girl
I’m supposed to be

You can take the passion away from the girl
but you can’t take the passion out of this girl

I can’t deny the pain
I can’t deny the change
I can’t forget the fade
and I must not leave decayed

It’s too late to turn back now
I’m running out of sound
and I am changing

changing….

And if I’d stop right now
Stop titling these moments…
Who would I become?
Do I even dare play that drum?

I would rather die in the battle field
then in the hiding of shame concealed
If wining this fight means pain
Then courage I must gain

It was a slow fade
It is slow recovery
A worthwhile fight
to be the girl who was meant for flight
A girl who has been broken down
To now be built back up once more
Stronger than before.

I am not yet dead
I may be unread
but, I am fully alive
ready to survive!

I won’t deny the pain
I won’t deny the change

You can take the passion away from the girl
but you can not take the passion out of this girl!

~L

and for those who don’t care to rock that much… here is the acoustic version;) Which I like just as much as the rock out version ;)

Not my will… my will would be to give in, give up… but HIS will keeps me alive fully ready to live another day out of shame in into love where I am the girl who IS fully alive…

Fully alive
More than most
Ready to smile and love life
Fully alive and she knows
How to believe in Jesus

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5 responses to “Slow fade. Slow recovery.

  1. This is beautiful, Layla and it made me cry. Your story is (unfortunately) one that resonates with too many in this broken world. You have a rich destiny and you are building the foundation with this blog. Keep on keepin’ on! S

    • Thank you… didn’t mean for it to make anyone cry… i wrote this in my car on my phone after my last appointment… the words just came.

  2. I honor your work ~L. Thank you.

  3. Pingback: The Thursday Post 7.4.11 | Ethereal Heights

To all that let me know your thoughts... I appreciate each one. Thank you for reading all my Untitledmoments. ~L

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