Monthly Archives: December 2010

In the stillness of the night!

I wrote this many months ago and yet this is still a very real on-going battle for me…   No one said healing from such a crime would be a hop, skip and a jump to ‘la la’ land…  their is a truth that gives me hope… i just need to keep the faith… and starve away the persistent doubt. They can’t have all of me.  This post was protected for a very long time… I’m unlocking it in hopes that it’s okay to disbelieve that curse full of damning lies and be very real with you today. (6.27.11)

IN THE STILLNESS OF THE NIGHT

In the stillness of the night as humans sleep …another world awake.
It begins to lurk into homes where windows have been left open
and doors remain unlocked

In the stillness of the night as a little girl lies a sleep.
Alone, there she is dreaming…  as her angels are unaware
Their swords have dropped be their side and her God has seems to disappear This is not the time for her protectors to be left napping
A little girl has been left in despair
as ‘they’ are now unwrapping

Heavens realm has been sealed tight
from protecting her tonight
As demons awake they
lurk around those supposed protectors of the night

How easy for them to carry her in this dark flight.

They slipped under her covers
Taunting her dreams that hover
Darkness blankets her cries
and haunting melodic sounds whisper her lullabies

Fear has imprisoned
Now possessed humans have arisen.
No longer a home to keep her warm
yet now there she lay,
Belonging to the cold unknown to be conformed
Where evil has tainted with her soul
Her Angels and Saints have lost control
as she fearfully lies less than whole

This is awful! This cannot be!
I shall testify what I see!

In the stillness of the night darkness has come for me
with just enough flickering light to see
these monsters taking over thee

Her little belly in knots
Her tiny hands too still
my sinking soul meditates despite the chill
Child eyes scan the room
for just one angle to rescue her from this doom.

God, please! Fight for her till dawn
Cradle her in the silver lining of Your embrace
hold her still in Your grace
Don’t let them know her soul lies safe
and no curse will break Your grip on her.
If they know
They won’t let go
until they finished killing
as blood forever spilling.

As night fades back to dawn
and my mind has been removed
Rushing water drowns her soul,
traps her thoughts as she now ‘goes’
this body can’t withstand the torture as it flows.

The water never hot enough
to clean the stains within
and never cold enough
to freeze remaining memories
Her mind has been strained
Tears too long have been refrained
Tears that now can hide
in this drowning so inhumane.
The memory is sent down the drain
as innocence has been slain

No longer can she maintain.
Her mind has been stained,
as these ritual drownings
ends the night in this crowning.

It’s not only imprinted in the deepest
corridors of her mind
but branded in her soul combined
as to the curse was burned deep to remind
of what can happen when her angels have been re-assigned

As scars remind
all that could rewind
to bring me back to evil mankind.
I swear to you I’m not blind!
With my own blood it has been signed.
I have been tortuously assigned
to never undermine!

Child now grown, trapped with in this uncertain adult…
now only memories assault.
Yet, still…in the “stillness” of the night…
I can’t help but wonder
who is still yet lurking into my bed with me at night.

~L

the light meets the dark

Here I am
As I am
Breathing in one breath at a time
and holding my breath through the scary moments
As darkness tries to take over…
I will push through
one breath at a time
one heart-aching moment at a time
as the light meets the dark

Here is where is the healing begins
Each moment from here on out I will claim as is
I’m sure I will fall
I will cry
I may scream
I may crash
Break a few things
Shout the hate
collapse in agony!
as the light meets the dark
Continue reading

the more I try the more it hurts…

Dark series #12 - the forest rouse

Image by Xavier Fargas via Flickr

Father, I’m going through some heavy things
It seems like this world isn’t getting any better
The more we try to get
closer to You
The farther we run from Your throne

I’ve spent so many nights wondering when will it end
When will the day come when happiness begins
I’m running the race but it seems too hard to win
I’m sick of mourning my stomach is throwing up in the morning

I’m calling for help and watching it melt away
My heart’s been put on display and put away
In many ways, many times I told myself it was ok
And anger was the price that was paid
While these faded dreams just screamed to bring them home

The burden was too heavy I kept running from the throne
I can’t take it any longer
I can taste my spirit hunger
God please help me get home

Lord though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
I’m not scared cause You’re holding my breath
I only fear that I don’t have enough time left
To tell the world that there’s no time left, Lord please
Lord though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
I’m not scared cause You’re holding my breath
I only fear that I don’t have enough time left
To tell the world that there’s no time left

Continue reading

Two small hands and ten small fingers

Two small hands and ten small fingers
turn the pages of a book
protect her from his evil look

Two small hands and ten small fingers
build a castle in the sand
push away his unwanted hand

Two small hands and ten small fingers
climb the tallest tree she sees
grasp the sheets beneath and freeze

Two small hands and ten small fingers
catching butterflies in her field
count the blocks to escape his wrath

Two small hands and ten small fingers
pressed together in a prayer
twist and pull at strands of hair
Continue reading

Protected: tears….

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God’s words to me tonight…

Be still in the presence of the Lord and wait patiently for him to act. Don’t worry about evil people who prosper or fret about their wicked schemes.
-Psalms 37:7

I think that says it all for tonight….