The world is full of broken people. The world is full of sadness. My question to myself is why do I care so much about the broken world. Why am I so passionate to make a difference in the lives of broken people, when I myself am so very broken? So… I understand this concept of putting the oxygen mask on myself first before I can help the person next to me. And I’m doing that. … so I suppose the reason for writing this post is to 1.) To remind myself why I am the way I am… (passionate) and 2) To let all you who are readers know my heart.
So are you ready for my heart to overflow in A.D.D. style? … cause that’s what it’s going to be…
I think I tend reach out to brokenness; I want to help those who hurt… it’s so hard to see broken souls, sad eyes, smile-less faces. I understand that my passions aren’t going to make me rich. I know at times it tires me out. Yet, how can I not do what God has designed me to do. I love God and I love His people… Is that not what it’s all about? Knowing God and making Him known?
So I tell myself, “L, get a grip! You’re so broken right now and maybe you’re being a little over dramatic… stop wearing your heart on your sleeve… the world is broken and it’s going to stay broken. ” Is it wrong for me to be so passionate… am I not balanced well? Is this not healthy? Well I am not sure on all of that… Yes, I need to make sure I am loving myself and taking care of me first, I am healing from a past that created broken me. So, great… I’m working on that.
So… waiting tables will never make me rich; BUT I get to connect with the lost, be a light, make someone smile, listen to people, care, and respond to brokenness… it’s all around me. And working at church… well that’s never going to buy my dream house or be able to shop like I want to:) BUT How amazing is it to pray at work, to sing at work, to love teens and build relationships with kids who are lost “broken” … I love to love… now trust… that I am very careful about… and for good reasons… but loving is something that I can do.
What about my enemies… can I love them… are they not broken? (sigh) I must admit, Where I’m at in life, this is hard. Forgiveness is an issue in a few areas… but in this weird way… I still want that brokenness to heal for them too… I just don’t want anything to do with it… and again, I think it’s for good reasons.
Whooh… are ya still with me? (I think my Aderoll has kicked in… or it’s wearing off and now you get the best of me:)
… round 2
I refuse to let the abuse define me… take over… cloud my thinking!!! I will not let him win… IF he could only see who I am… that I never lost my love… that my passions are used to glorify Jesus and he can’t stop that burning desire I have to live a life full of hope,faith, and LOVE… just to live. I am crazy in love with my Jesus and NO ONE can take that away from me!
Yes, I may walk throughout the valley of shadow of death… but i will fear no evil for my God is with me. And yes, life can get hard and flat out depressing. BUT, “hold heart my child I have come to rescue the broken” The Beatles state it well, “And when the brokenhearted people living in the world agree, there will be an answer, let it be. For though they may be parted there is still a chance that they will see, there will be an answer, let it be.” Jesus stated it better” “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” And what is the world… What does the news tell us… what do we see daily; the world is broken… and he tells us to take heart! He has overcome the brokenness”
If you’re still with me after all that rambling… than what I am trying to say is that I think I know who I am… and that’s a blessing to me tonight because I’ve been searching for a long time now… and it’s good to be me… THE REAL ME.
Let it be? or Be? I am going to BE…
I know that there is healing in HIS name.
That the brokenness is heal-able!
So… when we’re falling apart
with a broken heart…
there is still meaning in the pain…
there is still healing in HIS name…
there is still meaning… so hold on….
He has come to overcome the world… hang on another day… it will be okay.
The brokenness won’t last forever.
We have not lost our way.
…and I have not forgotten my way home!